It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
