dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
