Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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