I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
These tits shall not be calmed
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize