thus making me awesome and them whores
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
