She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
