yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I have already put on my inside pants.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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