What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
