That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
