3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
We left an ass print on the piano.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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