You're so nebulous sometimes
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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