i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
