I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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