They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
