So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
