Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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