Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize