a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
My ATM looks so different sober.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
