You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
accomplished twins. life is a go
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize