so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
they need to just BURY HIM!
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
