after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
