I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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