it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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