just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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