Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
my shit smells like andre
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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