The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
