So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Randomize