I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize