Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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