I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
