Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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