I hate your face
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
