ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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