After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
This is my gift to your gina
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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