I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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