He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
