You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
