How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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