Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
