doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Randomize
