Sponge bath it is.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
You've changed since you got that strap on
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
