Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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