The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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