I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
