Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize