Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
where am i from again
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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