dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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