In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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