i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
