I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
