im gay
i know
yea but for you.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
True strength comes from lack of pants
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
