Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
